


Talk Dirty to Me

by Emerald15



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Bilingual Character(s), Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Italian, Jealousy, Language Kink, M/M, Mutual Pining, One Shot, Spanish, Swearing, That one wank that brought the rating up to an M, Unbeta'ed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-07 02:35:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14071029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emerald15/pseuds/Emerald15
Summary: Being able to only speak English can suck sometimes. For Shane, however, it's for a vastly different reason.





	Talk Dirty to Me

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure whether Ryan speaks Spanish or not, but I remember there's a video where he said he has Mexican heritage, and Spanish is the national language of Mexico, so I've just ran with it as a headcanon more than anything.  
> Buzzfeed OC's are featured here, mainly b’cos idk many of the people who work at Buzzfeed.  
> Please see end notes for translations, which I got off Google, as neither Spanish nor Italian are one of the languages I'm fluent in, so please forgive me for any spelling/grammatical mistakes!  
> All comments and kudos are appreciated, thank you!

It was pouring with rain outside. Fat raindrops pelted the expansive windows, creating a heavy, static-like noise that echoed in the spacious office floor. Shane stared out at the streets below, absentmindedly watching the bustling pedestrians as he cradled a steaming hot coffee in his hands. He’d always found something peaceful about the rain, unlike many of his co-workers. A finger poked his arm.

“Earth to Shane,” Ryan grinned. “Did the aliens abduct you again?”

Shane chuckled. “Yeah, but their costumes were awful, man. I mean, seriously, you would think beings from another planet would have some kind of style.”

Ryan laughed, an infectious sound that soon had Shane laughing with him as they bantered back and forth.

“Eres tan lindo, Shane,” Ryan suddenly said, smiling almost to himself as they prepared to get back to work. Shane blinked, pausing with his headphones aloft.

“Huh?”

“What?”

“You said something about me. In Spanish.”

Ryan’s eyes widened slightly, before shrugging. “I said you’re so dumb, Shane. I mean, how can you say that this is not something saying ‘hello’?”

 

* * *

 

Shane was pretty sure he hadn’t been this drunk before. He laughed at something someone in the group said, before feeling a hand rest on his lower back. It was Charlie, one of the guys from Buzzfeed UK, who’d flown over for a new video they’d finished shooting earlier that day. The two had been paired together and the Londoner had turned out to be a funny guy, making sharp quips that had Shane both laughing and even blushing slightly whenever Charlie said something flirtatious. Shane couldn’t even remember what the video was supposed to be about.

“Hey man, you fancy a pint or something?” Charlie said loudly over the pounding music. Shane couldn’t help but grin at the thick London accent. As they headed to the bar, something in Shane fluttered as Charlie directed him with his hand still on his lower back. “Whatcha fancy, bello?”

They ordered a drink each, with Charlie also ordering shots of tequila for the two of them as well. Shane coughed as the liquor burned his throat, quickly reached for the wedge of lemon. Charlie laughed at his expression.

“Not a fan, bellissima?”

Shane shook his head, taking a gulp of his drink to rid his mouth of the taste of tequila. “What’s ‘bellissima’?”

“It’s Italian,” Charlie explained, sliding closer towards Shane. “My mother is from Italy and we’ve always spoken to each other in Italian.” Their bodies were barely an inch apart now. Charlie rested a hand on Shane’s waist. The air had become very hot all of a sudden. “It means g–”

“Excuse me.”

Shane jumped as someone squeezed between the two of them. “Oh! Hey, Ryan.”

Ryan’s eyes widened in surprise. “Oh, hey Shane, didn’t see you there. You want anything?” He gestured towards the barman that’d appeared just as suddenly as Ryan had.

“Nah, I’m good, thanks. Charlie got me a drink; you remember Charlie, right? From earlier?”

Maybe it was the alcohol mixing in Shane’s system – god knows he’d have the mother of all hangovers tomorrow morning – or the lighting that kept changing, that made Shane see a flash of something in Ryan’s eyes as he turned to Charlie. Maybe he was imagining it, like the hard smiles the two men gave each other in greeting. Charlie flashed Shane a dazzling smile as Ryan turned back to the barman.

“How about we go somewhere quieter?” Charlie suggested, placing a warm hand on Shane’s arm. “Forse possiamo tornare al mio posto e ti farò vedere un bel momento, piccolo.”

Shane had no idea what Charlie had just said, but the way his green eyes sparkled and his voice deepened, ignited something in him. He leant into Charlie’s touch, happy to be taken anywhere the Londoner took him, as long as he kept speaking Italian. Charlie smiled, lowering his hand to grab Shane’s belt and give it a tug. Shane drunkenly stumbled forward. 

“Whoa, whoa!” Arms wrapped around his middle, holding him firmly. Shane looked down to see Ryan supporting him. “You okay, big guy?” Before Shane could say anything, Ryan turned to Charlie. “Thanks man, but I can take it from here. He’ll be okay with me.”

“Ryan,” Shane began.

“Vamos a llevarte a casa, Shane.”

Quickly spinning him around, Ryan directed Shane through the heavy crowd of dancers and just as Shane’s drunken brain caught up with being spun around in the first place, there was a cool breeze of fresh air on his face. As Shane felt himself being pulled to the right, his hand shot out to balance himself on a nearby wall. He vaguely heard Ryan calling his name, asking if he was okay, before emptying his stomach contents on the ground.

He was definitely going to have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.

 

* * *

 

Shane had a problem.

Maybe it was something he’d distinctively known for a while, but it had certainly come with a sudden burst of realisation. He tightened his grip on his coffee mug as it threatened to slip through his grasp.

“Sí, esa es una buena idea, Jake. ¿Necesitas que traiga algo?” Ryan asked, his phone balanced between his shoulder and his ear. He didn’t seem to notice Shane staring for several minutes as he talked.

The taller man shook himself out of his stupor and quickly walked back to his chair next to Ryan. He squirmed as Ryan chatted, the quick fluency of Spanish making his head dizzy as his blood flowed south.

 _Shit, no, not now!_ Shane panicked, taking a large gulp of piping hot coffee that only served to scold his tongue and throat. “Fuck!”

“Espera, Jake, te devolveré la llamada.” Ryan hung up and turned to Shane, looking worried. “You okay, big guy?”

“Yeah, uh, sorry,” Shane jumped out of his chair. “Bathroom!”

Darting inside the stall of a thankfully deserted bathroom, Shane groaned as he unbuttoned his jeans low enough to pull out his hardening cock. Leaning against the stall, Shane began stroking himself, eyes closing as he got lost in pleasure. Almost immediately, Charlie’s voice murmured smooth Italian as his green eyes and flirtatious smile appeared before Shane’s minds eye. Shane’s breath hitched as the Londoner leaned closer.

Suddenly, his green eyes turned brown, and the smooth Italian became a husky Spanish. Charlie disappeared, pushed aside as Ryan took his place. Shane bit his lip to stop himself from moaning out loud, hand moving faster on his cock as he imagined Ryan whispering filthy Spanish words in his ear, telling him to get on his knees like the good boy that he was.

A low moan escaped through Shane’s lips, chest heaving as he panted. He thought of Ryan standing above him, hand fisting in Shane’s thick brown hair as he pulled out his cock. Shane slapped a hand over his own mouth to quieten his loud cry as he came into the tight fist of his hand.

 

* * *

 

It took a nearly embarrassing amount of time for Shane and Ryan to confess their feelings towards each other. Shane had laughed whilst Ryan had furiously blushed when several of their co-workers frowned in confusion, because _were you guys not together already?_ On the plus side, investigations weren’t so bad, especially for Ryan, now he had someone’s hand to hold whenever a shadow made him jump.

Shane laughed as Ryan spluttered in disbelief, incredulous that Shane could so easily debunk a piece of evidence he had been so sure about. Haven moved into their own apartment together, the two often edited their respective videos on the spacious couch, their legs tangled together.

“Tienes suerte de que te amo,” Ryan muttered. Shane’s laughter quickly died, the taller man coughing awkwardly. Ryan frowned, watching Shane fidget uncomfortably for a few moments. “What’s up, bebé?”

“N-Nothing.”

Ryan had known Shane long enough to know when he was lying, meaning something was wrong. Plus, they had been together for several months now, which also meant that whilst they hadn’t had sex yet, Ryan had had the pleasure of seeing Shane was he was turned on. Suddenly, it was if a switch had been flicked on in Ryan’s head. Shane was turned on – by him speaking Spanish.

“¿Te gusta cuando hablo español, Shane?” he asked casually.

Shane’s eyes snapped over at him. “Ryan,” he warned.

“¿Qué?” Ryan smirked. “Te gusta.”

Shane groaned. “I don’t know what you’re saying.”

“No creo que eso importe. Podría decir algo y todavía te excitaría. Podría decir cuánto quería golpearte hoy en el escritorio en el trabajo.” Ryan winked. “Siempre te has visto tan guapo en esos jeans.”

“Okay, I definitely know you said something about my jeans,” Shane chuckled. He set his laptop aside, turning to face Ryan better. “Why don’t you teach me some Spanish?”

“Say: cogerme,” Ryan said. Shane repeated the word several times until his pronunciation was almost identical to Ryan’s.

“What’s it mean?”

“It’s more something you should be saying to me,” Ryan grinned wickedly as he turned back to his laptop, making a few adjustments to his video.

Shane sighed, picking up his laptop. After a couple of minutes, an idea popped into his head. Opening a new tab, he quickly made several Google searches. One in particular had him raising an eyebrow. _Son of a bitch,_ he thought. _Well, if it’s what he wants me to say…_

After several minutes of mentally rehearsing, Shane put his laptop back down, plucking Ryan’s off his lap and ignoring the surprised “hey!” He straddled Ryan’s hips, tilting the other man’s face to meet his.

“Ryan. Deberías cogerme.”

It had its intended effect. Ryan surged up to meet Shane’s lips in a passionate kiss, as he grabbed Shane’s hips to bring him even closer.

“Todo lo que quieras, mi amor.”

**Author's Note:**

> Translations:  
> (Spanish) Eres tan lindo = You’re so cute  
> (Italian) bello = handsome  
> (Italian) bellissima = gorgeous  
> (Italian) Forse possiamo tornare al mio posto e ti farò vedere un bel momento, piccolo = Maybe we can go back to my place and I’ll show you a good time, baby  
> (Spanish) Vamos a llevarte a casa = Let’s take you home  
> Sí, esa es una buena idea, Jake. ¿Necesitas que traiga algo? = Yeah, that’s a good idea, Jake. Do you need me to bring anything?  
> Espera, Jake, te devolveré la llamada. = Hang on, Jake, I’ll call you back.  
> Tienes suerte de que te amo = You’re lucky I love you  
> bebé = babe/baby  
> ¿Te gusta cuando hablo español, Shane? = Do you like it when I speak Spanish, Shane?  
> ¿Qué? = What?  
> Te gusta. = You like it.  
> No creo que eso importe. Podría decir algo y todavía te excitaría. Podría decir cuánto quería golpearte hoy en el escritorio en el trabajo. = I don’t think that matters. I could say anything and it would still turn you on. I could say how much I wanted to bend you over the desk at work today.  
> Siempre te has visto tan guapo en esos jeans = You’ve always looked so fucking gorgeous in those jeans.  
> cogerme = Fuck me  
> Deberías cogerme. = You should fuck me.  
> Todo lo que quieras, mi amor. = Anything you want, my love.
> 
> EDIT: just a quick shoutout to user poetdameron (sorry, I don't know how to tag in the notes section) for taking the time to correct me of my spelling on one of the Spanish words, thank you! All spellings/translations should hopefully be correct now :)


End file.
